Everything I do

I know this is old news, but Lindsay Lohan was admitted to a London hospital last Friday to get 10 stitches in her shin from a spill with a teacup in Bryan Adam's $5 million "mansion".

So according to Star magazine, "She and her friends were preparing breakfast, with eggs and everything, and Lindsay was going up the stairs, carrying a ceramic teacup," Dina explains to Star. "She had just come out of the shower so she was still wet and had some lotion on, and she completely flipped on the stairs since it was slippery...."

Does anyone else think its weird that she was making breakfast and showering at Bryan Adam's house in London? They say he is a Lohan "family friend" who lets her and her entourage stay there while in London. Oh give me a break, GET A HOTEL. Secondly, how is Bryan affording a $5 million mortgage, especially since LL is paying him with BJ's? What was his last successful gig? Anyone?

I just don't get it, hopefully next time she goes to the hospital she won't come out.

Team Beth

MTv's Real World/Road Rules challenges are always the same. They round up some "Z"-list MTv celebs, hire random X-gamer to host the show, go to a tropical location, people get drunk, fight and the same people get ostracized every year (Beth and Tonya). I really tried not to get involved in it all this season, but I have failed, and now I am waist deep into the drama.

A new episode aired last night and it was about the same as the rest. There was yelling, crying, drinking, smoking and little athleticism to go around. However, in the last two episodes there
has been a new and intriguing twist, Beth is the Capitan of the Veterans team!

The way the season works this year is there are 2 teams, Veterans and Rookies. Each team has a male and female captain and each "challenge" is either a male or female Gauntlet day. So the losing team has to pick a person to challenge the captain (male or female, depending on the day)

So two weeks ago, the Vet's female captain Ruthie (the drunk) challenged Beth (the token outcast of the show) to the Gauntlet. You see, the Vet's haven't learned from past seasons not vote people off because of personality and to use strategy instead (Coral and Miz- this team needs you!). The Gauntlet game was Challengers Choice and Beth picked Reverse Tug of War. (Note- Beth is about my size and Ruthie is about Nicole Ritchie's size) I wonder who will win....

Shocker! Beth won and Ruthie had to pack her bags and go back to being an alcoholic. So now Beth is the captain of the Veterans and I love every second of it. Now don't get me wrong, I hate Beth. I think Beth is ugly, annoying and evil. However, the fact that the Veteran team hates her so bad and the Rookies love her so bad, cracks me up.

--Spoiler Alert---

Last night in a female Gauntlet night, the Veterans lost again (Go Rookies!). This meant that Beth had to take another female team member to the Gauntlet. Montana (the ugly lesbian) became victim to the Captain’s choice-- Reverse Tug of War.

The Rookies cheered on Beth as loud as they could and Beth wins, again.

Veterans really hate it, and I really love it.

What ever happened to...

Jessica McClure?

That's right, Baby Jessica who captured the world in her dramatic rescue from an abandoned well, has taken the plunge once again:

People magazine says on its Web site that Jessica McClure, now 19, married Daniel Morales at a rural church outside Midland, Texas, on Saturday.



Cheers to you Jessica, you must have really fallen in love. I hope this time it works out as well as the first. (Thanks, RJM)

I sure hope with the 13 year age difference between you and your husband you don't fall victim to divorce, as well.

Major Music Alert.

I have come to the realization that my music tastes are essentially on par with a middle aged woman.

My current XM station of choice is The Blend which is where, "you'll hear nothing but adult favorites, from Elton John, Billy Joel, Madonna, Hall & Oates, and lots more..."

(Note: currently playing, Tina Turner's What's Love Got to Do with It) Which reminds me of when Ike Tuner (Laurence Fishburne) beat the shit out of Tina (Angela Bassett) and she responds by saying, "Is that your best shot? Huh? You can't do no better than that?" Classic.

Anyway, so Brown Sara and I might be some of the biggest Phil Collins fans under the age of 40, ever. BS and I have gone as far as to drive by his house in Beverly Hills, CA, and also feel the need to call each other and sing his songs whenever they are heard on the radio (After Hours is a hot time for Phil's hits)

While I am sitting here at my desk listening to the adult contemporary station minding my business, Easy Lover (aka the Ode to BS) begins to play and I, obviously, get very excited. I glance over to my radio and see the artist is Philip Bailey! So I listen for a few versus and determine that it is in fact, Phil Collins, singing.

I immediately call BS where we uncover this major music alert, Easy Lover is a duet with Philip Bailey and Phil Collins.

This is brand new information and, from my perspective, really shakes the solid ground my fan-hood is based on. It's not that I feel jilted that Phil would sing in a duet (since he was a member of Genesis and the majority of musical classics are duets). It's that I didn't know the song was a duet and XM would have the audacity to give Philip Bailey top billing over Phil Collins. I mean, who has ever heard of Philip Bailey? Easy Lover is clearly one of Phil Collins greatest hits.

Now poor Shar is now going to have to pay for both Phil and Phillip to perform at BS's wedding.

"Breaking"back Mountain News

Contact Music Reports: American Idol runner-up Clay Aiken is being urged to come clean about his sexuality by a former US Green Beret, who claims to have had a passionate tryst with the singer.

John Paulus, 38, took a lie detector test in a bid to prove claims he has made about Aiken's sexuality in an American tabloid are true.

Paulus tells the National Enquirer that he spent the night with Aiken after the singer emailed him just before Christmas (05) after seeing his ad on a gay website.

He claims he arranged to meet Aiken at a hotel in North Carolina after the singer asked him to be his "discreet bf (boyfriend)" and the couple had sex.

Now, Paulus wants his one-night stand to come out of the closet and tell the world he's gay.
He says, "Clay told me that he just came out of the closet to his mother and a few close friends last year... I hope he comes out of the closet because he'd be a great role model for the gay man."

Well slap me with a stick and call me Betty, Clay Aiken is gay?? I had NO idea.

Now to be fair, I can't decide if was his Measure of a Man or Merry Christmas with Love album that was the homosexuality deal-breaker. Or maybe it was his flawless rendition of Elton John's Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me?

You be the judge.

Google Image of the Day

Today's Google word of the day is: Salty

The image result:













Wait a minute, did I type Camryn Manheim by accident?

Sellout.

Oprah Winfrey is a big fat sellout. She gets heat from fans because she didn't think it was a big deal to fabricate parts of a novel.

Now all of the sudden:

"I feel duped," she said Thursday on her syndicated talk show. "But more importantly, I feel that you betrayed millions of readers."

"I left the impression that the truth is not important," Winfrey said Thursday of last week's call, saying that "e-mail after e-mail" from supporters of the book had cast a "cloud" over her judgment.

Really? Because you didn't feel so duped a few weeks ago when you said it was, "Much ado about nothing"

Maybe she should do some internal reflection and realize that she should have her own opinion, instead of just saying what is "popular" so she can make some more money and sleep on gold sheets with her queer boyfriend.

Hey Oprah, want the truth? I'll tell you the truth:

You are a fat no-talent self-centered ass clown

Ooga Chakka

Just when you thought David Hasselhoff's career couldn't get any more pathetic, he goes ahead and makes a music video like this:











click here to enjoy the video

Thanks to Scott for the link.

Vom.

While searching through Craiglist, I found an ad for the following "item" for sale:

Title: Excess Breast Milk

Good Morning;

My daughter was born on January 7, 2006. She was in the NICU for 10 days during which I pumped and brought the milk to the hospital, I guess this confused my breasts because at this point I am making 48-64 ounces of milk a day, and this is after I breastfeed my daughter. (who is now home with me) Anyways, if anyone is interested in having this extra breast milk, (I have a freezer full and will continue to pump.) Please send me an email. I have my paperwork from the hospital stating my disease status (all negative) but I am willing to go to a lab at your expense for your peace of mind. Email me and we can talk. Denisse

OK, I am going to go ahead and say this is the grossest thing I have ever read. Now I don't want a million comments about wet-nurses, blah, blah, because we don't live in the 1800's.

It's not only gross to offer your breast milk for sale, but it's even grosser to buy it from a stranger. If you can't breast feed, then use formula. I also know that formula is expensive, but I would be more than happy to pay my mom back every penny of my formula's cost to thank her for not using a strangers milk.

I bet both KFed and CarrotTop drank strangers breast milk.

The Google Game

So my good friend Sara* started this game a long time ago, so during some down-time here at work I thought I would revive it.

The object of the game is to put in a random word and see what Google Images appear. Here is what I found today:

Google: Ronya

Image Result:

Dawg.

Super sleuth LKB called me on Monday night and wanted us to do some research on a rumor that she heard....Was Randy Jackson in Journey??

Our initial reaction is NO WAY!! Come to find out that Randy Jackson was actually a bass player for Journey from 1983 to 1986! Who knew? Good find, Lare.

Here are some other facts about Randy that you could really care less about:

- He was born in Baton Rouge, LA
- He lost 100 lbs in gastric bypass surgery
- He is not related to Samuel L. Jackson

Like, Duh.

To append Jenni's most recent posting about Paris being either a no talent ass-clown or dirty pirate hooker, I would like to add the obvious addition to any nickname: effing idiot

Compliments of MSN, below is a partial transcript from her testimony in the $10 million defamation suit against her by Zeta Graff, the 42-year old (old lady) ex-girlfriend of ex-boyfriend Paris Latsis:

On her people skills: "If something happens bad to someone, I just don't talk to them again. I don't confront people. I don't do anything."

On being kind to others: "I was trying to be nice. Because if you are nice to someone, then they can't talk bad about you. Like, they'll feel bad saying mean things about you."

On the impact of technology: "Whatever I write in an email, it doesn't mean anything. It is just words I write."

On interpersonal relationships: "I meet so many people. I don't even know some of my friends' names."

On her former publicist referring to Graff as a "stalker" in the Page Six piece: "I would never say stalking. I'm not like a dude. Like, I think a girl can only stalk a guy. She can't really stalk another girl."

On her deep knowledge of Greek culture: "It is like a weird Greek name. Like Douglas or ..."

On whether she knew that "U.K. publications" had picked up the Graff item: "No ... there is stuff in London." When her lawyer points out that "London is a U.K. publication," Paris replies, "Right. U.K. Whatever."

On globetrotting: "I was in Europe the whole summer, and all there is is like French -- I didn't see anything [about the Graff story] because I wasn't in America."

On the physical impact of the deposition: "I'm so hungry."

On Graff's alleged plan to bring down Paris and Paris: "[Latsis] said that she was going to do voodoo on me. And I kind of do believe in that stuff a little bit, so I was a little bit scared about that ... " Continues Hilton, "[Latsis] said that she threatened to send Mexican people to come and beat the [bleep] out of him."

The deposition concludes with a worried Paris asking, "This is not going to the media, right?" Told that it wasn't, she sighed, "Good."

Ms. Hilton, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone is now dumber for having read it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

Lessons Learned

Tonight RomStud and I went to see Matchpoint. On our way out of the theatre he says to me:
Well, if I learned anything from that movie it's that I want to live in London.



Woody Allen must be proud of that feedback.

Peace, Frog.

My fascination with Peace Frogs began in May of 2005, on the way to Norfolk for my good friend Renea's bachlorette party.

There was a car in front of us with a peace frog sticker, which made us wonder:

If peace frogs were ever "in", they should certainly be way "out" by now

But the joke is on us. I seems that peace frogs are more in than we could have ever imagined. On that one weekend trip alone we saw 8 peace frog stickers (two on one car!). So started the peace frog game.

So grab your camera phone or digital camera and send me your Peace Frog sighting.

Thanks to MaryAnn in Virginia Beach for this one today:

MTv News, you hear it.....first

While eating an brunch-ish type meal today at the Deli, La glanced at the TV airing MSNBC as said, "It's weird to see Alison Stewart on 'real' news?" My response was:

"You know, what ever happened to Kennedy?"

As if I am Miss Cleo or something, I then found this article in yesterdays San Jose Mercury News.

That's right, Lisa Kennedy Montgomery will be hosting Fox Reality Channel's "Reality Remix,'' a daily update on all things in the world of reality series.

Note: I highly recommend the Fox Reality Channel. They air both Temptation Island and Paradise Hotel (which is arguably one of the best reality shows of all time).

Speaking of which, did you know:

American Idol’s third-place contestant, Nikki McKibbin and Paradise Hotel and Love Cruise’s resident Yahtzee!-playing, bug-eyed freak-out queen, Toni Ferrari are sisters?

Game On.

UD- Words of the day

Thanks to Lala for re-introducing me to the entertainment of the Urban Dictionary, UD. Not to be confused with Uncle Danny.

After taking a quick gander of the site I found two new words that caught my attention. Here are the words and their exact definition from UD:

Patananny
the female orfice; a vagina

Benny: Kevin, you smack that Jew's patananny yet?
Kevin: I gonna stuff that bitch just like a regular thanksgiving turkey.


Homeskillit
N: Friend. Partner. Amigo.

I will see you tomorrow homeskillit.

I'll tell you why not...

....because I liked it!

I am really getting sick and tired of the networks cancelling shows that I really like.

RIP: Emily's Reasons Why Not

Yeah yeah, I missed you

Who in the hell thought "Let's make Lisa Loeb's life into reality show?"

Maybe I should pitch a show to the networks about A Day in the Life of Josh Saviano

The Big Apple

Well, the Soup has been on vacation for the past few days. Want to know more about this debacle, please read on:

For Christmas, my Brother give our Mom and me a trip to the Big Apple for 3 days (airfare, hotel and theatre tickets to the Odd Couple included). What a wonderful and thoughtful gift! We had big plans of going shopping, pre-theatre dinner, the show, relaxing, Little Italy...etc.

Here is what really happened:

Friday
Mom (who has the flu, mind you) and I get to the airport at about 5:30pm for our 7:05pm flight to LaGuardia. We Express Check-In at United and our flight is already delayed till 11:30 pm. We go talk to the "information booth" and they tell us that Air Traffic Control has delayed the flight and there is nothing we can do. We proceed to our gate where the flight time has changed back to 7:05pm. We are skeptical, but decide to eat at TGI Fridays and check the monitors periodically.

Once dinner is finished (and I finish my beer that I *really* needed), our flight is still scheduled to leave at 7:05. We go to the gate and await boarding. Then the ticket agents change the time to 8:00pm. A little later than expected, but still OK with us.

Mom then checks the board which now says our flight is cancelled. She goes to the ticket agent and says, "The board says the flight is cancelled" they go oh really? Then look at their monitors and announce the flight is cancelled due to "weather" and we are sent to the "Customer Service" desk with about 100 other people.

We had (hands down) the rudest "customer service" representative from United ever! He informed us:
1) The flight was cancelled due to weather
2) There were no flights Friday or Saturday
3) It wasn't United's fault we couldn't get there, so they can't get us on another airline
4) "I guess you can't go"
5) You should go get a refund for our tickets and buy tickets on another airline

With no other options, we go to another "customer service" line. As I stand there in line with about 200 other domestic and international flyers with cancelled flights, Mom decides we should call Expedia (dot com) to see if they can help us.

I am connected to the nicest woman ever-- Holler at you Desiree! She contacts United herself and after much ado was able to find us a flight the next morning from Dulles-- Boston--LaGuardia.

She then contacts the Park Central Hotel and informs them that we will not be there the night and asks about a refund. After some more drama, they refuse to refund us for the night, but since she feels so bad for us she has Expedia refund the night! We then shuttle back out to long-term parking and head back to Great Falls for the night.

Saturday
We arise at 5:30am to get to Dulles for our 8:00am flight to Boston. The line for security is like 3 miles long and by the time we get to the front Mom and I are determined to be a security risk
because of our changed itinerary (along with about 35 other people). So we get blown with air to test for bombs or something, our luggage gets searched and we wait in a pen for the middle school drop-out TSA employees to wave us along.

We arrive in Boston with no drama at about 10:00am. By this point we have made friends with the other LaGuardia refugees. We are herded onto a bus once the plane lands and taken to the US Airways terminal to catch our 11:00am flight to LaGuardia.

As we proceed up the escalator, we see the departure terminal that says:

Gate 7a To: LaGuardia/NY Departure: 11:00 Status: Cancelled

So this now becomes high drama because we are not only stuck, but we are stuck in Boston and the time until the Odd Couple begins is getting close. The 4 of us (2 other refugees, Mom and me) head to the ticket counter where they book us on the 1:00pm flight that is "flying in from Dulles, so we don't know if it will even arrive" Great.

Well, the flight does arrive from Dulles about 30 minutes late, but by 3:00pm we have arrived into LaGuardia airport.

Finally, we make it to the hotel. Here is a transcript from our conversation:

me- Hi, we're here to check in, last name Bordeeeen
lady behind desk- (typing) I'm sorry ma'am, check in isn't until 4:00pm and we only have smoking rooms available
mom- (groans) I just want to lay down *note still sick with the flu
me- I'm sorry NO, it has taken us 24 hours to get here from Washington DC. We had 2 cancelled flights, ended up in Boston, missed our first night here and you all wouldn't refund our money. Therefore, that room should be vacant waiting for us or you all got paid twice, which is it?
lady behind desk- would you like to speak with the manager?
me- yes
manager- can I help you?
me- yes, we just went through hell to get here for a trip that should have taken 2 hours. Your hotel refused to refund our money last night, therefore, our room should be available.
lady behind desk- your room is ready

Here ends the story of our trip to NYC. We did make the show which was hilarious, we made it to Little Italy and we made it back to VA without any problems.

Merry Christmas to us!

History in the making...

For the first time in history, I actually agree with the self-righteous and ego-centric Oprah Winfrey.

The author of, A Million Little Pieces, has been getting a bad rap for: "substantially fabricating his criminal record and other aspects of his past"

Oprah dismisses the claim as, "much ado about nothing" and is urging readers who have been inspired by the book to "Keep holding on."

Amen, Oprah.

I mean, it's a book for christ sake. For those of you who haven't read it, it's an over the top and very wild story about the authors experience with drugs, alcohol, crime, and his experiences in rehab.

If anyone actually cares that he may have jazzed up the story to make a good book that is entertaining to read, then you need to get a life.

This just in...

It seems this one-eyed cat had "a medical condition"


Really? Thanks for breaking that new story, reporters from The Obvious Weekly

Right Now...

I am now sick of 20 on 20 on my XM radio; therefore, I have changed the dial to The 90's on 9. I must say this channel has brought back some really good memories from Song of the Month at Great Falls Elementary to the Old Firehouse Teen Center. Here is a sample playlist that keeps me coming back for more:

Calloway- I Wanna Be Rich
Salt N Pepa- Let's Talk About Sex
Color Me Badd- All 4 Love and I Wanna Sex You Up
Shaggy- Mr. Boombastic *currently playing
Van Halen- Right Now

When Right Now came on, I immediately IM'ed Rommie at which point we (almost) simultaneously wrote: Crystal Pepsi

That’s right kids, give me a name, phone number or birthday and I’ve forgotten it in 5 seconds. But play a catchy tune and it will immediately bring forth the memories of a not-so uberly refreshing beverage that has been shelved for some 13 years.

Anyone wanna go grab some KFC popcorn chicken? It’s 2 Legit 2 Quit.

"is that what the kids are calling [you] these days?"

Welcome to the first of what hopefully will become a frequent joint venture between Borrowing (and causing) t-r-o-u-b-l-e and The Soup du Jour.

So, we never really call anyone (at least when referring to them in [slanderous] conversation) by their real names. Everyone has a nickname and, for some reason, they always seem to stick, no questions asked. The inspiration behind some of these names has long since been forgotten, but the name--and legend--lives on. Sometimes, if you're lucky, the names are based in love/like. But, more often that not, not so much.

Sometimes the names come about from certain events where the person was present (I will never live down Pooponya...shortened to, you guessed it, Poop). Other times, it is because of a characteristic (whether beyond the person's control or not) the person has (sup, Brown Sara). Sometimes, it's because of a misunderstanding (hey, Nick the Granite Guy). And sometimes, it's just because (Asshole--fits several individuals interchangeably). Sometimes, because they are so "worthy," individuals have more than one nickname, the one you use chosen based on that day's/hour's/minute's specific transgression(s) (Sweenie, Morris the Cat, Effer). More often than not, the individuals are unaware of their pseudonyms. Thank God.

So, you already know

Nick the Granite Guy and
Brown Sara

And you've met, through our blog links,

Uncle Danny

We'd like to introduce you to:

My favorite "cousin"
Abu Shekha
Mean Uncle
Her rainbow husband
HAB
Monochrome
W.T.F. T.O.T.
Sketchy Eddie
Car Wash Gary
Rizzle Jizzle, Jizzle Mizzle and Rizzle Mizzle (aka Rom Stizzle or Rom Steezy)
Tom Dildo
JRizaradSK8gal
Habib Marwan
Tommy Tow Truck
Chico
Larry
Hua Mei the Baby Panda
Squeaky
Aunt Danny
Our white cousin
Belinga (Bling Bling)

The joy of having the two of us write this is that you don't know who made which nickname contributions. This is sure to be (oh we hope we hope we hope) kind of like "Missed Connections" on craigslist...you're going to think/hope/wonder if the person being spoken of is you or someone you know. In this case, you probably better hope that it's not. We're not mean, really. We're just...convenient.

Just like the SATs.....

Today's soup is an SAT prep lesson:

Jessica is to Ashlee as Michael is to......

a) football
b) Virginia Tech
c) Marcus
d) none of the above

The correct answer is C, and if you said anything else then you are stupid.

You see, both Marcus and Ashlee are the less famous and clearly less talented younger siblings of Michael and Jessica. Both Michael and Jessica had to work *relatively* hard to get to where they are today, nor did they get by on their last name legacy alone. They didn't have siblings who knew the business, had contacts or even millions of dollars to help them.

Both Jessica and Michael have talent. They had the drive to succeed and, in Jessica's case, a creepy boob-grabbing ex-minister father/manager to help.

On the other hand, Ashlee and Marcus already have their path to success paved. The only missing element.....is talent and common sense.

Let's breakdown their careers:

Ashlee:

• Starred in the MTV bomb, The Ashlee Simpson Show
• Dated Ryan Cabrera (a ziggga zaa)
• Got boo'ed after a hideous performance during the Orange Bowl
• Got busted lip-syncing on SNL
• She collapses due to exhaustion in Japan
• Gets drunk and causes a scene at McDonalds

Marcus:

• Arrested and charged with four misdemeanors (allowing the underage girls to have alcohol and allegedly having sex with a 15-year-old.)
• Charged with reckless driving and possession of marijuana
• Suspended from the university for the 2004 season
• Flicks off WVu fans who have been calling him names related to past problems throughout the game (which I applaud!)
• Pulled over by police in Hampton for driving 38 mph in a 25 mph zone and driving with a suspended license.
• Is kicked off team at Virginia Tech for legal trouble and unsportsmanlike conduct in Gator Bowl
• Arrested and charged with three counts of brandishing a firearm

So Marcus and Ashlee, just stop now. You aren't really famous and you're not any good.

I hate CarrotTop

While doing a search of LasVegas.com to find shows that will be playing during our upcoming trip, I stumbled upon my most hated "celebrity" (and I use that term v. loosely) of all time:

You guessed it, CarrotTop!

I hate CarrotTop more than probably anyone else in this world. I hate him more than I hate Rosie O'Donnell, Tara Reid, Gwyenth Paltrow and Madonna. I hate him more than I hate Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan combined. I even hate him more than I hate Tori Spelling.

On top of being hideously ugly, he's not even FUNNY. Comedian my ass. I am going to go make fun of the people that would actually pay money (and waste their time) to see him.

When CarrotTop dies (which cannot be soon enough)- I am going to throw a carrot themed party. I will be serving:

Carrot Crudities
Carrot Juice
Glazed Carrots
Carrot Cake
Carrot Loaf
Carrot Soup
Carrot Casserole

You're all invited. So break out your diamonds baby....We're having a party.

Note: After popping her Soup of the Day blog cherry, my friend Kristen sent me this link that almost made me have a stroke.

As much of a shock as this is....

....to nobody, it seems that TomKat's relationship is on the fritz. During a recent holiday bonanza with the Holmes and Cruise family "Tom and Katie ended up leaving -- three days earlier than planned" according to a 'close friend' of Cruise. "Katie was in tears, but that's standard when it comes to dealing with family matters and Tom."

I have an idea, maybe she was in tears because she just realized that she:

1) is engaged to a old midget
2) believes the universe is ruled by aliens
3) has summer-teeth
4) is bearing a bastard child
5) conceived via turkey baster

That is why I would cry, not because the families don't get along. I mean LBH, whose families really get along?

Nerd Alert

So Yahoo! News reports that researchers at the Central Missouri State University have identified the largest prime number. This number was found by programming 700 computers several years ago.

The number that the team found is 9.1 million digits long. It is a Mersenne prime known as M30402457 — that's 2 to the 30,402,457th power minus 1.
(Note-Mersenne primes are a special category expressed as 2 to the "p" power minus 1, in which "p" also is a prime number.- DUH)

A chemisty professor at CMSU is quoted as saying, "We're super excited, we've been looking for such a number for a long time" I mean really, you are SUPER excited?

If I were to be SUPER excited about something it would have to be something pretty major, such as:

1) Winning the lottery
2) Carrot-top's death
3) Beverly Hills 90210 on DVD
4) The completion of Rommie's condo
5) New writers on Days of Our Lives
6) Kirk Herbstriet's divorce
7) Winning the Amazing Race
8) Having a pet panda

Now those are things to be excited about, not a number. But I am wondering, wouldn't 2 to the 30,402,4579th power minus 1 be one digit longer? God I'm smart.

Protesting works if you keep quiet

For those of you who cannot take a joke, Comedy Central has pulled what was destined to be one of the most outrageous episodes of all time, Bloody Mary:

In the episode, a statue of the Virgin Mary is believed to be bleeding from its rear end, inspiring faithful parishioners to flock from miles around to be healed by the miraculous blood.

Eventually, Pope Benedict XVI is called in to investigate, whereupon he determines that the statue is actually menstruating and thus is nothing special. "A chick bleeding out her vagina is no miracle," the pope declares in the episode. "Chicks bleed out their vaginas all the time."

Ok, so it's gross- but you know it made you laugh, well it made me laugh because its a CARTOON.

This leads me into how protestors these days have it all wrong. Attention Catholic League and anal parents of Northern Virginia: the more publicity to bring to something- the more attention it gets (especially from children).

For example, remember the oh so dramatic window at the Victoria's Secret in Tysons Corner mall? If everyone had shut the hell up about it in the first place, nobody would have really noticed or cared. But instead, the crazy mothers of NOVa had to protest and make a big deal out of it.

What did this do?

It dramatically increased the visibility of the store (and I'm sure the sales, as well) There were news cameras everywhere and people walking by just to see what all the commotion is about. I am sure there are teens who wouldn't have even looked up walking by, but now made a special trip to the mall to check out the naked mannequins that are probably a lot less revealing than the Hustlers they have under their bed.

In addition, I am not an avid South Park fan. Therefore, I would have had no idea this episode was being aired. But now that everyone is make such a big deal about it, I'm sure the more popular the episode is going to be. I know I am going to try and see it.....

In conclusion, if you really don't want people to see or notice something-- don't tell them. Similar to the classic, "Don't look behind you" and everyone immediately turns around. You know you've done it.